Floribama Shore Season 2 Episode 1 Recap: Psycho-Ass Beach
MTV’s trashier and more extreme version of Jersey Shore returned to the air Monday night, and it meant we got to catch up with the wild cast once again.
The reason for this request? Nilsa wanted to bunk with Aimee and felt like she had the right to ask for someone else to give up their space for her.
If you watch Jersey Shore online, or any other reality TV series that focuses on a group living in a house together, you know that the room situation is generally dealt with in a reasonable manner.
If you get to the house first, you get a good room. If not, you get to sleep outside with the alligators. We kid, mostly, but you get our drift.
Needless to say, Kortni was not at all amused about it and admitted that she was ready to fly off the handle with Nilsa if she tried to pull any crap with her during the summer.
Also, Kortni was the one who urinated all over the room on the series premiere, so we think it’s fair to say that she had every right to want that room back.
It’s best to keep the bed wetters contained to the one room because, well, the whole house could be deemed unfit for purpose if it smells of urine.
Kortni has always been a livewire and has the potential to throw in enough drama to cause World War III. Codi and Gus wasted no time in using the room situation to their advantage.
They swapped her belongings with Nilsa’s, and it sent Kortni off on an expletive-filled tirade that would give Jenelle Evans a run for her money.
Kortni wanted to know who was “f–cking with my s–t.” She might as well have been a robot created by the same people who made the Sammi doll on Jersey Shore.
Codi made his way to the loo and claimed that if she thought he was dropping the kids off at the pool, it would take him out of the frame.
Well, he did not put it quite like that, but he was freaking the eff out in case Kortni lashed out at him. Instead, Kortni went straight to his belongings and started throwing them down the stairs.
Codi wants to look good, and that’s why he walked into the house with all of his clothing on hangers. Despite his freshly ironed shirts being put in jeopardy, the thing that set Codi off was that she threw his white pants down the stairs.
Kortni called a house meeting, but that did not do anything to diffuse the situation. She subsequently punched the wall, leaving a huge dent and claiming that she would do the same to anyone who crossed her.
Kortni did finally calm down, but the damage was done. The wall was busted. We should probably say her hand was busted, too, but we do not condone violent behavior.
When Codi fessed up, Kortni was happy to know it was not Nilsa, but there was visibly something going on behind those eyes. She was all over the place.
The roomies went out to make sure they had the best first night ever, and bumped into Kortni’s new squeeze, Logan, who was surprisingly calm.
They do say that opposites attract, right?
Kortni was dancing on the bar for some free shots, and just generally making an ass of herself. Logan did not like this and flipped out when his girlfriend and Kirk started playing stupid games in the cab.
Kortni was too drunk even to know whether she needed a poop or a haircut. In true Kortni fashion, she raced out of the cab and got ready to start throwing punches at Logan.
Is it Monday yet?
The other houseguests were overshadowed by Kortni’s antics, but the other most notable scene involved Aimee and Codi thinking they had somehow made their way to Washington, D.C.
The pair thought they were standing outside the White House and started chatting about independence. Little did they know the rest of the world was laughing at them.
What did you think of the premiere? Did Kortni go too far?
Hit the comments below.